I'm getting lost in my own world.....this crazy medical challenge is already sucking me dry and I'm just drained......BUT.....this one tough broad will continue to put one foot in front of the other every morning regardless.....a girl's gotta pee ya know...LOL...

Last week was the "dry run" and remapping for radiation...this was not pleasant.....lets just say when I'm on the table not only is my ass hiked up in the air...now I'm adjusted like a crooked S.....and this kills my lower back....everyday for 15 minutes.....and they have a special "O" ring to cushion my port....that is not pleasant either......Oh....the jist of it....I HATE radiation everyday.....but I go in saying "its a joyous day and I'm so happy to be here" they just laugh at me.... I'm sure they are all thinking here comes that crazy lady with her heels and our hospital gown...what a fashion statement....pictures to follow next week!  Ha

On my "off" days....they find my casual attire much different.....check out the "china women" look!

My week-end sucked....was sick on Saturday did mange to get my nails done.....doggie sat for Heather and Jake Saturday night.....rested on Sunday....I'm sure my nervous and anxiety where in full swing for chemo and radiation on Monday...... not much to desire these days....far cry from the "Taf" everyone is used to blowing through the door 150 miles an hour clanging around with all her bling.....and her ugly purse.....soon...I promise...soon

Monday.....Oh boy....radiation first.......I count the beams they are shooting in my ass ....in my head I yell "fire in the hole"....I can't really yell it out loud because my chin is resting on a cushion and I'm not allowed to move one bit.....and some of the ladies that work there are like Nurse Ratchet!  LOL I know soon I will slip up as I get to know them better....teeehheee

Then we were off to Chemo....Oh lord....once again a bit of a gitty up.....

 I'm not sure I can even remember all of it....I wasn't happy and either was Dave.....we had an appointment at 1:30 and we were still in the waiting room at 2:15......you won't believe it...another insurance issue.....not anything I needed to worry about...but they had to "verify" I have met my deductible again and out of pocket....shit really...couldn't of you done this before I came.....the receptionist said will "Rachel" checked in February.....seriously.....it's almost April....good help is so hard to find....finally in the "Chemo" chair.....baby Taf calm down I said to myself....."she is going to poke your port and that's all there is to it".....seriously I'm like a little girl....blat ass.....but first we have to check your blood.....Noooo your kidding right.....she comes back a few minutes later.....and says quietly...."are you bleeding anywhere?".......I said ....."excuse me" as I'm looking myself over......she asked again....."are you bleeding anywhere"....I leaned in and said....yeah out my ass....it's like having a period out your ass......not sure she was thrilled with my response....but I didn't give a shit....she said....I cannot treat you until I consult with the doctor......you are severely anemic....I said...well he knew that......wait AGAIN......she comes back.....you need an Iron Injecterfer and a blood transfusion....the Injecterfer can be done today, but the blood transfusion will need to be done at the hospital in outpatient care....OMG are you kidding me right now.....what the fuck.....seriously I just want this fucking over with.....she said I don't even know how you are walking around....are you dizzy or blacking out.....ahhhh yea, but I manage it.....she just looked at me....I said...this has been going on since last May......she raised her eyebrows....wow......yea....long period.....ha

Needless to say we were home at 5:30.....so much for our 30-45 minute visit for "pump" hook up....

To wrap up the past few days.....I have been to Chemo and Radiation twice.....it appears after radiation it whips my ass for about 4 hours or so.....the phrase "my ass is on fire" is totally different now......I will need to think of a phrase for what it feels like now because I'm not sure how to explain it yet, but no worries I will......I have named my "pump" Sally....she is my friend and goes everywhere with me and knows everything.......but I look forward to our departure on Friday for a week-end break.....she does get annoying.....now I feel like I have an extra hemorrhoid up my ass....Sally suck up.....well here's to hump day of my first week of therapy....yes I'm counting....so glad I have made it this far......Whewie!